this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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