i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Randomize
