At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
it glows. i had to have it.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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