i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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