i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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