love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
