their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize