no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
