love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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