i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
