I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
