try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
