shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
