i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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