i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Randomize
