We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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