Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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