i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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