well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
