She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize