Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
