he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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