i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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