love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
