i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
