I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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