thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
