I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
