He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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