i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
