Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize