Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
