I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Drake has all the answers
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize