There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Randomize
