4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I have feelings that need drinking.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
