I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
