I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
