they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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