used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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