i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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