I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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