I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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