I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize