I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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