So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
