Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
