What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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