Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
