people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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