I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
