Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
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